Print Edition

The mailman or mailwoman finally took the hurculean effort of stuffing MidWeek (a free local weekly advertisement newspaper) into our mailboxes. Usually the mail person just dumps a pile into a plastic bin on the lobby floor next to the mailboxes for whoever wants them enough that they're willing to reach down into the bin and grab a copy. You would use the newsprint for fish n' chips. Real fish n' chips are served on newspaper to absorb the oil (if you missed that). With malt vinegar as a condiment. Judging by the pile of Midweek's still remaining in the plastic bin at the end of the week, then only a few actually get read. Well, as long as the advertisers aren't aware of this practice all is well. That is, the advertisers pay a rate per page based on the circulation numbers. In that cents, the hundred copies delivered to our apartment building count as hundred subscribers. At least when the Midweek's were deposited into individual mailboxes this method of calculation had a ring of truth to it. However, most tenants would just tossed the Midweek into the lobby wastebasket anyways along with the junk mail. I actually read through the latest Midweek edition browsing through the advertisements and reading the human interest columns written by local writers/celebreties. Don't remember much, but what I realized was that I hadn't read any publication in it's paper edition for over a year. Does this mean we're saving a whole lot of trees, forests even. It might mean just that providing that the new law the city council is pushing doesn't pass. They want to tack on a 20¢ surcharge for each plastic bag at the grocery store or takeout lunch counter which only means paper bags are used in place of plastic. Oh, I almost forget to mention. "Another thing," as they say. As we speak, the new phone books are stacked on the lobby floor. I'm almost certain that the phone books are suppose to be dropped off at each floor at each tenants door step. But they aren't. Haven't been in years.

Obama's State of the Union

I thought Obama's speech wasn't long enough. If you're from the islands, we're really gonna miss Obama when he's not the president anymore. If Obama doesn't win the next election, this would be Obama's final State of the Union address. That's mainly why I felt tonight's speech wasn't long enough, in addition, to the fact, that Obama is a tremendous orator and time pass swiftly than listening to a usual lengthy State of the Union speech which has it's obligatory boring moments. Then there's the rousing standing ovation becuz the audience has been already bored to death and glad it's over until next year. Not with an Obama speech. That's irregardless where Obama deliveries a given speech. Obama made history by becoming the nation's first black president. The next election Obama will have to defy history by becoming the first president to be re-elected with the kind of negative economic numbers he has on his hands. Even Obama in an interview acknowledged the possibilty. As you already know, I don't like Mrs. Obama a lot. Not as a person, because I don't know her personally. There might be a lot other people who feel the same way and this might cost Obama votes. Me, I'm just voting for the local boy made good despite my dislike for the current First Lady. There's been enough commentary made analyzing the State of the Union speech for me to add anything to .... now what was tonight's speech about? Oh, the usual utopian themes.

Any credible Republican opponent has good odds of defeating Obama. But that's just the problem the Repubs have with Gingrich leading in the primary elections. 4 years is not long enough to erase the memory of the Bush disaster and replace Democrat Obama with a Republican who is no better than the captain of the Costa Concordia cruise liner. In that sense, Gingrich is the best thing that could happen to the Democratic Party. This clown while criticizing Clinton for his affair with Monika Lewinsky was back at his office cheating on his wife with a female staffer. His own political party members forced him to resign his Speaker of the House position. I thought Romney was a formidable opponent in light of the down economy. But Romney may be history and that's a good thing for the Democrats. Oh, I will say one thing about the state of the union .... I don't think the US accomplished anything worthwhile in Afghanistan after 8 years. True, had the military not been diverted to fight the needless Iraqi War, the Afghan War would have been long over and the Taliban well the Taliban wouldn't exist. But as things stands, the reality is that after the final US troop withdrawal, the Afghans will go back to growing their poppy fields and life will continue on as it has been for centuries. If Obama doesn't get re-elected and if it was solely left up to me he should be our next governor. However, another 4 more years as president is better. This isn't gonna happen again soon. Local boy as president of the USA. You're done well, Barry.

The Persistance of Memory

This is the second week in-a-row that I've forgotten to tune in to watch Hawaii Five-O. You know that tv series shot on location in the islands and airs on Monday nights. I don't watch much tv at all if that factors into the forgetfulness. Remembering to watch tv doesn't come with the territory so to speak certain shows on certain days of the week as part of a standard routine.

Tuesday's Tupperware

I said previously that I ripen fresh fruit from the grocery store in the microwave. Fruits are usually shipped green to Hawaii. I forgot to loosen the lid on the tupperware container as it was cooling down. As you can see for yourself. Musta been too preoccupied on the Internet or sumpthing of that nature.

Saturday's Walmart

Dear Reader, does your Walmart have four doors at each front entrance. And do shoppers leaving the Walmart, exit through the left door instead of the right door? And do shoppers entering the Walmart, enter through the left door instead of the right door, as well? Or does this only happen at the Keeaumoku Street Walmart in Honolulu?

In Soverign Air Space

T'was an uneventful morning along the Ala Wai except for a helicopter hovering over the adjacent Ala Wai municipal golf course within a few hundred feet range from my apartment lanai (balcony). I felt like a birder taking a pic of the helicopter (photo above). It's a 4x telephoto. Then dang it at the very moment I was down loading the photos from the SD card to my computer. And why wouldn't it happen that way .... the helicopter did a flyby at eye level to my lanai bearing down the canal. Dang it. That woulda been a Kodak moment, emphasis on 'woulda'. A few minutes later the helicopter returned upstream and started hovering over the golf course again just like it did before. Perhaps they're gathering film footage for a future Hawaii Five-O episode. As you can see, there's a huge camera mounted in front of the helicopter cockpit. I don't think they're taking pics of the talapia. So I rested my camera on the lanai railing and motioned, too far for an audible, to the helicopter to do the flyby at eye level to my apartment a second time. I don't care .... just do it anyways. If you really must know .... I want to post a pic of you on my blog. Is this too much to ask er request er from one filmographer to another (over and out). So, on my cue, Mr. Helicopter Pilot, camera, lights, action. Like I said, I was feeling like a birder. Well, it did happen again. The helicopter started to descend and then fly low above the Ala Wai canal with a trajectory that would take it's flight path pass my lanai again. However, my trusty 4 megpixel camera which I always keep handy has a 1½-inch LCD viewfinder. When the helicopter flew by within arm length pass my lanai I wasn't able to find the darn bird in my tiny viewfinder. Remember it was a moving helicopter to boot. I was this close to heaving ho the camera into the Ala Wai canal many feet below. The fleeting kodak moment, below.

Another Voggy Day

But not too bad for paddle practice ....

It'll be a Voggy Day

Grocery List

I very seldom use a shopping cart or even a shopping basket while grocery shopping. The strategy behind this is that I won't overbuy or purchase things that I'm physically unable to carry hugging whatever items I have with my arms full as it is already. The larger items are easier to pick up than the little items. So the little items are gathered off the store shelves before the larger items since I can usually reach for and grab a given larger item one handed if I follow that procedure of order while cradling the little items in my makeshift kangaroo pouch. No, not with my t-shirt pulled up and out but more with the items held like a halfback holding a football to his tummy with his forearm. I'm not recommending the method. Just mentioned it in a blog gist type of way. I was just about done shopping when I noticed that oranges were on sale. But than I already had all the items I had planned to buy cradled in my arms. So I had to put those items down on the top of the orange pile where the topography of the orange pile is flat. This lady shopper next to me starts excavating the oranges below my stack of groceries on the north face of the mesa of oranges. Yes, I did think that was odd of her. If not impolite too. "Why don't cha sift through the oranges stacked on a different quadrant," I thought loudly to myself wishing she'll perhaps hear my thoughts. But she was deaf. This is due to the influence of the word S-A-L-E on people's minds. Anyways, later when I ate an orange at home, it was junk. On sale, but nonetheless, junk. The skin on the orange was thick and the individual segments were huge. And the membrane on the individual segments were though not as thick but reminiscent of a pomelo. The taste was nothing to write home about either.

The Bah! Humbug! Club

Oh, Well.

"....this month got away from me, which I think is pretty common in December." (David Lebovitz)

Surely T'is the Season

it felt cold around here with temperatures dipping into the lower 70 degrees the past few days. It's probably the reason I noticed little room size heaters being sold at the hardware store. Are room size heaters sold year round? Perhaps, but you never notice them on the store shelves until winter arrives, it's not like Xmas trees. They're there but your eyes or radar don't make them out by the same token that $1.50 polish hot dogs sold at Costco don't pop in your mind unless you're hungry at the moment even though you drove by the store earlier during the same day without note.

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in other news, strangely I haven't seen any Ala Wai ducks lately. They're usually flying around in formation above the canal.

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in world news, if the passing of "Dear Leader" brings democracy to North Koreans, "20 million citizens who basically missed out on the 20th century," economically speaking, the blessing in disguise, er, disguised as bliss, might eventually spell disaster for the South Korean economy. The North Koreans will work for peanuts manufacturing the same products that South Korea churns out. For example, $5 for an 8 hour day is astronomical wages to North Koreans on a good day. That's just an arbitrary figure but I'm sure that factory workers in the South make much more than $5 a day and thus how will the South compete with the Northerners in this market scenario. With a Free North Korea, the threat from north of the border moves from nuclear to one of economic, and possibly the same fate awaits South Korea that befell Taiwan after global outsourcing in that region of the world shifted to China to the mutual exclusion of the Taiwanese.

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went shopping at Long's Drugs (CVS). As such, this is a public service bulletin that the mania has commenced at the stores. It's more probably last minute shopping for normal household items because people want to avoid running out of stuff this holiday weekend. Save the elbowing for Monday's sale on gift wrapping paper. Take a pic of the wrapping paper and blog about it. What title would so fit a post so appropriately about discounted Xmas wrapping paper? The parking lot was filled while cars were taxiing in line bumper-to-bumper waiting for a stall to open up while the drivers exuded so much holiday spirit that they musta thought Santa knows. For example, somebody honked in anger, and the adversarial party honked back with even more thump. Perhaps they were fighting over who should be the one to run over the Xmas grinch. Mind you, this was only 2pm. It's Tuesday isn't it, the 20th? Obviously time is of essence. The salvation army worker manning the red kettle was ringing her bell with the regular non-stop rythme. Btw, aren't they suppose to wear a red suit, she wasn't. Good luck to her anyways. No, she wasn't a celebrity bell ringer or the mayor. Just an hourly worker. President Obama would never dare drop a coin in the salvation army kettle because true to form the republicans would jump all over the gesture characterizing it as a craven campaign promotion. Amazingly, inside Long's the atmosphere was very subdued. The consensus being I'll stay and shop for hours just so nobody gets my parking stall. I didn't mean myself. I exited as soon as I was done.

Non-Deliveries

How some things have a way of repeating themselves. The UPS deliveryman recorded the reason for my undelivered package as .... "package delayed, security check by gov't or other agency -- beyond UPS control." Somebody must have sent me a banned agricultural item or even better some hazardous material. Then later that evening when the deliveryman gets back at the UPS delivery depot, "The receiver is not listed on the building directory." The driver has made numerous deliveries to me and to this address within his route, and knows from experience that for our building, the directory board has only ring-up numbers, not the names of the individual residents themselves listed next to the apartment numbers. A 4-lb. package in an humongous 8x8 cardboard box is costing me $40(USD)(UPS) now add two inconsistent excuses to that. The better alternative was to have my package routed to a UPS store to hold for me and picked up at my convenience, but there's an inexplicable $5 UPS surcharge for that option. My internet items cost $90, so the $40 shipping is expensive enough to tack on an additional surcharge. Meanwhile, UPS's competitor FedEx doesn't charge to hold your package at their nearest FedEx outlet. I talked to a UPS person on the toll free number about this, inquiring, "Don't you have to make a deliver attempt of the same package to some address anyway? Like what's the difference?" Her reply was, "UPS stores are franchises," from which I gathered that the franchisees make a $5 bonus instead of being a team player. Okay I can see the sense for oversize packages or if the contents are diamonds and paying an extra $5 is minuscule in context.

Anyways, the UPS supervisor talks to the delivery driver and his newly revised reason for the non-delivery is that, "The building's ring-up phone wasn't working." I am beginning to lose track of the different variations of the theme. "But we'll deliver your package this afternoon." So I'm steaming when the deliveryman arrives and had some angry words for him to suit the occasion. It turns out that our building's entry ring-up phone isn't working. What's deceiving is that my phone rings and receives voice transmission but the party at the other end standing at the ring-up board can't hear anything back even though the lines are connected. This time the driver used his cellphone, so cellphone to cellphone. Well bozo your story would have been believable if you had only stuck to a single rendition, offense taken, offense meant. There's enough things that conspire for miscommunication as it is. When you don't keep your story straight it will trigger suspicions to the contrary. Last year the same UPS driver falsified his delivery times and I had words with him although I kept it between ourselves not the UPS office. When he argued back, I reminded him rather loudly that all he is is a lowly delivery boy wearing a brown shirt. So if isn't too much of a giant leap quit acting like the prince of the city as if your 'services' and attitude are indispensable. In the larger picture, Honolulu is getting so third world with the makeup of the immigration that the third world attitude is becoming pervasive. To do good is to do yourself bad if you get the gist. And it doesn't take much. According to the latest US Consensus figures, Hawaii as a whole only gained around a net 4000 local people in the last 10 year period. By appearances, this UPS deliveryman arrived here from a third world country at an early age with his parents and is trying to rid his brain and shake his ass of whatever lingering inferiorities lurking beneath the punk exterior. They really had it too easy.

Up the Canal and Back Down Again.

Eventually you reach the Bora Bora of your goals. That would be as near to an unofficial motto as any. The team .... ♪♪ Some of us will grow up to be lawyers and kings, and some of us will end up in Sing Sing ♪♪. I'm not quite sure I have the lyrics right. No, no google. People sue Google for giving them carpal tunnel syndrome. I've been watching kids canoe practicing for decades on our city's glorious Ala Wai canal world renowned for it's sparkling waters rich in natural and vital nutrients. A glassful will make you glow at night for weeks. By the same token, ever seen a healthy looking health food freak. The majority of these young paddlers will never ever be fast enough to make the elite racing teams, but on a daily basis they inspire residents and pedestrians alike to get up off their fat okoles and undertake some of form of exercise of their own.

Orange Monday

This morning, I took a spin around Waikiki and the sidewalks were filled with people who ran in yesterday's marathon. They're easy to spot because they're wearing the official orange T-shirt emblazoned with the 2011 Honolulu Marathon logo and orange it was every where. What struck me about today's post marathoners was that they weren't hobbling around. Were not. I finally saw two orange shirt people who were actually the only hobblers out of the thousands that I passed by. Traditionally, the marathon hobble is what marathoners did the next day. Musta gone outta fad or something. Even if they didn't happen to be wearing their finisher's T-shirt you knew right off the bat that they were limping around because they did the marathon the day before. So, I thought to myself perhaps the hobble that I remember was the marathoners that I saw later on the day of the marathon a few hours later. But even if that was true, how was it that this year's marathoners were able to get fully recuperated, or seem that way, by the very next morning? Both body and soul. Either there's a miracle potion that came in their marathon packages or they loaned their marathon T-shirts to a person who accompanied them to Honolulu.

McMackin Out As Hawaii Football Coach

Ain't McMackin's fault that UH ended up with a 6 - 7 losing season with all the injuries on the team including one of the top quarterbacks in national ranks and possibly the best ever in the history of UH at that position. What draws the fire is McMackin status as the highest paid state employee at $1.1 million per year. The governor makes around $117,000 per year. However, even the $1.1 million amount wasn't something McMackin negotiated as an ultimatum. It's was handed to him more as sour grapes in response to coach June Jones ignominous early departure to Southern Methodist University. In June Jones' case he refused to hand over $400,000 due the University for breach of contract even though the SMU payroll overlapped the same $400,000 pay period so essentially a zero net loss though Jones promoted it as homage. In stark contrast, McMackin is forgoing $500,000 of his next year's $1.1 mil salary which he is legally entitled in full as severance. At any rate, for the most part, college head football coaches' salary are way out of line with their actual worth. Unless they're coaching top 10 perennial powerhouse teams where they're a step way from a head coach position in the NFL, college coaching is essentially a minor league level either the provenance of coaches who can't quite make the grade on the NFL roster, or a haven for fumbling coaches who were booted out of their NFL positions. About the only notable exception is Jim Walsh of the San Francisco 49'er's who decided to leave the Super Bowl champions and coach Stanford University at the most inopportune time since the 49'ers went on the win a few more Super Bowls. Customarily the generous salaries of the college head football coaches is justified on the basis that the huge revenue that a football team rakes in is money enough to spare a million or two to attract the best coach money can buy to pursue a winning season a token amount to the overall investment if ya know your math. However, the bulk of the football's revenue comes from the tv rights to broadcast the games live which the local fans don't get to watch live unless they subscribe to the pay-per-view broadcast. There's no professional sports team in the islands if that's a factor. Understandably, I haven't had the opportunity to watch a UH football live game on tv for a while and I'm not sure whether the delayed broadcast applies to away-from-home games as well. If tv revenue underwrites the generosity of the coach's salary, than the other side of the ledger should include the cost to upkeep the on-campus training facility and practice field in the same stroke of the pen without the point shaving. The talk now is finding McMackin's replacement and paying him $500,000 per year, period.

But Still

There's two kinds of shoppers at the checkout counter that irritate me. There's more but these two species are all that I'm able to think of at the moment. There'll be a Part II sequel if this rant receives plenty 'likes'. Ever seen those 'like' and 'dislike' buttons with the thumbs down or thumbs up symbols which for some strange reason the widget isn't available for blogs yet. Or perhaps the widget is available for lack of a better term. After I recently posted about the "Speed Tester" to ping your download speed, a Brad responded with a cautionary tale (paraphrasing), "didn't you know Speed Tester was around for a while already." Score one for the readers' "dislike" button. There's the type of shopper who shops accompanied by an entourage. It might have been just a spur of the moment kinda thing. But still. Oh, a flash mob. When the group gets to the checkout line the people with the shopper stand between you and the shopper who's busy punching in his/her PIN on the machine, so anybody in line directly behind the group including me isn't able to advance an inch until the shopper has paid for his groceries or sundries, etc, and the group departs en masse. Why don't the shopper's friends skudimooch around the shopper and stand at the end of the checkout counter and perhaps make themselves useful by bagging the groceries since they're not doing anything anyways except occupying space and being in people's way in the same process.

Just the other day, there was .... "there happened to be" .... this lady in front of me in the same checkout line. After she unloaded her groceries from the shopping cart and placed them on the conveyor belt, she proceeded to walk in front of the shopping cart to punch the buttons on the pay machine. And that's where her cart stayed. Between her and me. To her credit she did load the bagged groceries into the abandoned shopping cart then push the cart with her outta the store. Hurrah. I still thought that was odd of her though.

The Infamous Safeway Sandwich and is Light-Headedness a Valid Excuse

HONOLULU (HawaiiNewsNow) - The couple who had their daughter taken away by Child Protective Services during their infamous Safeway sandwich shoplifting case had their case officially dismissed.

Monday's court hearing was a mere formality after Safeway announced it would not pursue shoplifting charges against Nicole and Marcin Leszczynski.

In late October, the couple said they each ate a sandwich while shopping and forgot to pay for it.

The couple was arrested and their daughter, Zophia, was briefly taken away when a manager pressed charges.

Personally, I don't believe for a nano second that Mrs. Leszczynski wasn't at least marginally aware that the Safeway cashier had failed to ring up the sandwich while the cashier was scanning the rest of the $50 worth of grocery items. The cashier would have had to retrieve the empty sandwich wrapper and scan it which is something noticeable. That said, I've had cashiers fail to scan a 50¢ peel-off coupon on a bottle of ketchup so forth and never realized it until I was unloading the ketchup in the pantry primarily because I wasn't actively scrutinizing the cashier. For a $5 sandwich though if they had hauled away just one of the parents the punishment would have been commensurate to the crime under the circumstances that without parents their child would become immediately an orphan. Torts for Tots. Perhaps the security guard who put the tail on the couple should have pepper sprayed the criminals.

In the over all scheme of things, Safeway must dump a lot of unsold sandwiches at the end of the day. Unless they have catering equipment to keep the sandwiches cold, the unsold stock isn't donate-able because of the bacteria count in the mayonnaise. And who likes bacteria sandwiches. Have you seen the size of some of the pre-prepared sandwiches. They're a foot long and stacked about 4-inches high. Hawaii's original name was the Sandwich Isles after the Earl of Sandwich who sponsored Capt. Cook's expeditions. However that's the former name of the state. I use to volunteer picking up unsold scones and pastries at participating Starbucks and delivering it to community centers. On not so busy days we use to pick up tubs of the pastries in total. Then this overzealous know-it-all fellow volunteer, "we should inform Starbucks that they're making way too many scones." The person in charge of the program replies back to her, "Shut the effing up." After all, scones are only flour and water.

Puhleeze Don't Regift Your Presents

Period.

Speed Tester or Lack Thereof

I stumbled upon this Internet speed tester on the Web, and is my ISP blazingly fast or not. The data also shows that my 'server' is located 2400-miles away if that has anything to do with transmission speeds.

71% of the US is faster than my ISP
which clocks in at a measly 2.86 Mb/sec.

78.86 Mb/s.
Stanford University, California.

27.60 Mb/s.
Montreal, Canada.





The tester is available here. The page below will appear.