The Middleman

I was busy at work the past week and the Ides of March passed by without much fanfare. Union wages with $500 per day on weekends. Week days with comparable pay. Not too shabby, but therefore, no computer. Once you get on the computer there's a clear and ever present risk that you might end up still on it late into the morning hours. At daylight, you drag ass, and no if's, and's or butt's, about it, you get your ass kicked off the job. I just couldn't restrain myself from the previous sentence. Self-censor it yourself if it offends your sensibilities. Other than that, nothing substantive to report on except the job was a slam bam pace to finish up the project on schedule and the project is indeed done. And done well, if I may add myself. Oh, is it only me, or is a pound of margarine more expensive than a pound of butter at the grocery store?

The problem with a "few" carpenters, and won't mention names, is their lack of money management skills to a point where....this female carpenter at work, "I like drink soda for lunch, but I no mo $1.50 for the soda machine." That's not a rhetorical statement. It packs an agenda. Meaning, "Like, go and find the $1.50 somewhere else, LOL." Well, I only had a credit card but nonetheless, "I tell you what, the soda machine does accept credit cards, so I'll buy a soda for you, especially for you, when I buy mines at lunch." It's still a full two hours before lunch. No more than a ½-hour later, lo and behold, Female Carpenter is back informing me of a deal she just struck up to procure cigarettes fully aware that we both ran out of cigarettes for the rest of the day. She decrees that if I also buy a soda for the carpenter that she happened to be working with....

Apparently, the carpenter that Female Carpenter is working with, didn't bring one dollar bills to work. The soda machine doesn't accept denominations above one dollar bills. Of material, that aforementioned carpenter has cigarettes. As a standing rule, I pay 50¢ for every cigarette that I bum off from a fellow carpenter. Female Carpenter explains...."Well, since a bottle of soda costs $1.50, a bottle of soda equates to three cigarettes at 50¢ a cigarette by that exchange rate. Like, huh? How did I get to be a party to this transaction. But still, just about when I'm this far away from commending her, Female Carpenter spouts, "Now we get cigarettes to smoke." WE. Do the math, yourself. "I buy the cigarettes, not to mention the bottle of soda for you, and now, WE get to smoke the cigarettes that I get to buy. WE, didn't buy the cigarettes, and WE ain't smoking the cigarettes." Female Carpenter is a renown bi-polar in the trade quite famous for her frequent erratic outbursts, so I'll skip the details how that went over with her.